Sunday, February 24, 2008


BILL: Now, you've REALLY blown it, Hillary. I said to CHALLENGE him about those leaflets, not have a hissy fit. You came on like the Wicked Witch of the North. Your face was as red as your jacket. And, why'd you have to dis him so viciously right after that love fest in Texas? You seemed positively schizo!

HILL: That wasn't MY idea to suck up to Obama in the debate. That was Mark Penn's cockamamie plan. He said it would make me look sympathetic. That slick upstart, Obama, is stealing what should rightfully be mine. I'm at the end of my rope. I don't know what to do. And, YOU certainly haven't helped any.

BILL: Oh, now it's MY fault, huh? Come on, Hillary. Stop looking for other people to blame. Face it, you're a lousy campaigner. All detail smarts but no retail smarts. All wonk, but no conk. You can't deliver that knock-out punch.

HILL: (shouting shrilly) I WANT TO BE PRESIDENT, DAMNIT. I DESERVE TO BE PRESIDENT! He can't do this to me. There's got to be SOMETHING I can do.

BILL: Have your people scoured the records to see if he ever had some hanky-panky? Some little back-room tryst?

HILL: Don't you think if there was anything we could find, we'd have come out with it by now? Besides, it would only remind people of how you made out with that fat little bimbo. It's hard enough to keep bragging about your Presidency without pushing THAT button.

BILL: Well, keep accusing him of plagiarism.

HILL: How can I do that when I quoted YOU in that riff I gave at the end about my troubles being nothing compared to most Americans? Talk about plagiarism.

BILL: Then, Hillary, you're just going to have to cope with the truth -- you might not be President. Learn to live with it.

HILL: No, no, don't even think such a thing. I HAVE to be President. Go away. I don't want to hear what you're saying. And, I know that in your heart you don't really WANT me to be President. That's why you've been screwing up my campaign. You wouldn't be able to take being subordinate to me. (throws pillow at him)

BILL: Hillary, get a grip on yourself. Remember, you have to be controlled and disciplined. Think of your image.

HILL: (throws another pillow at him, throws herself on the floor and has a two-year-old-child like temper tantrum, flailing her legs and arms) I DON'T CARE, I WANT TO BE PRESIDENT! I WANT TO BE PRESIDENT. (keeps screaming until BILL throws a glass of cold water on her -- then she sputters to quiet whimpering)

BILL: That's better. Here....take a hit of cocaine. It always calms you down.
(gives her a sniff, while singing)


Friday, February 22, 2008

Inasmuch as I am a singer-songwriter with many credits, I have written a number of songs relevant to our group since I founded Grandmothers Against the War in 2003, and have performed them in theatres, cabarets, churches, galas, peace meetings, and so on throughout the United States and also in Europe. I thought you'd enjoy hearing two of them on the following YOUTUBE site. The songs are: "Grannies, Let's Unite" and "I've Got to Take Back My Country," performed by me with two pro singers, Rosie Jun and Helen मिल्स, in our trio, THE NEW YORK GRANNY CHICKS. Enjoy!

Monday, February 18, 2008


HILL: Can't you keep that big mouth of yours shut and stick to the script? Why on earth did you have to get into a fight with that Obama heckler in Ohio?
Do we have to hog-tie you?

BILL: If you think I'm gonna let somebody insult ME, the President of the United States, you're even crazier than I thought.

HILL: But you're NOT President any more. Your job now is to help ME become President.

BILL: Don't give me that crap, Hillary, I'll do what I want. The only reason you're running for President is because you're my wife, nothing more. Do you think you'd have ever had a serious possibility of running for office on your own? Get real!

HILL: What are you talking about, you egomaniac? I've had 35 years of experience.

BILL: Which experience are you talking about -- when you worked for multi-national corporations in that Arkansas law firm? Or maybe you mean when you were screaming at me when I was Governor about how much you hated living in Arkansas. Or sulking in the White House because you had to organize dinner parties. Some experience.

HILL: You never would have become president if I hadn't agreed to stay with you when the press got wind of your affair with that Flowers bimbo. So, you owe me big-time, Mister. And that means you do what I tell you to do. And I'm telling you to stop getting off-message. You're really screwing things up for me. You're making this about YOUR presidency, not what I'll do in MINE. And, people are beginning to worry about what you'll do when I'm in the White House. They think you'll take over.

BILL: You don't think you'll have a clue what to do on your own, do you? Do you think I'm going to sit there and plan state dinner party menus? No way. I'll be looking over your shoulder every step of the way and keeping you out of trouble.

HILL: Oh, yeah? You'll be too busy scoping out the interns to pay attention to what I do, just like when you threw away your presidency because you couldn't keep your hands off the help. And, another thing, you've got to get a grip on yourself when you're campaigning for me. That fight you got into with the pro-life person was very damaging to my image. I need as many pro-lifers to vote for me as I can get. You watch your mouth, bubba.

BILL: You control freak!

HILL; You tin Romeo!

BILL: Listen to the Ice Queen!

They throw pillows at each other, get into a physical tussle (not a romantic one).

Wednesday, February 13, 2008



A group of well over 150 older women all across the United States organized within the last 36 hours to prepare and sign a statement to counteract the prevailing media spin that Older Women are for Hillary. More names are flooding in by the hour. Here is our statement and the names of those who are currently signed on.

Statement of Older Women for Obama

Why does the media repeat the mantra "older women are for Hillary?" It's not true. We have found each other informally, and found that, far from being alone among our friends, we are many, we are legion. We have discovered one friend after another who has come to the same conclusions. These are a few of many we share: - Senator Obama's intellect is outstanding. His broad and deep grasp of the difficult national and international issues of our day is remarkable. - He has nearly two decades of wide, hands-on, personal experience with difficult major city, state, and national issues. - He has been a subtle and successful legislative strategist.- We have noted that he has won the endorsement of people respected all over the world for their knowledge, experience, and character, such as George Soros and Paul Volcker. - We have seen that Senator Obama had the wisdom to see a war in Iraq for what it would be. Worse than a mistake, it would be a blunder. - Last on this wildly incomplete list, we have been impressed by his personal character. He has lived his beliefs. This week, we started an email tree to see how many friends and friends of friends were of our thinking. Within thirty-six hours, more than a hundred signed on to our statement endorsing Barack Obama, and names are coming in every hour from all over the country: cities, the countryside, the suburbs. These are older white collar, blue collar, pink collar women. We include politicians, television talk show hosts, professors, nurses, women in finance, businesswomen, authors, journalists, telecom workers -- even a cattle rancher. We are not to be pigeonholed by the pundits or the pollsters. All we have in common is more than forty years on this earth (which we share with billions of other people), our gender (which we share with fully half the human race), and our clear conviction that Barack Obama is the best person to be the next president of our United States.

Helen Hill Updike, Older Women for Obama, 2/13/08

SIGNATURES -- (partial list--many more available upon request)
Julia Widdowson, Millbrook, NY, grass fed cattle rancher
Martha Cornish, Atlanta GA, Photographer
Cornelia Calhoun, San Francisco, retired biologist
Panchita Wadley-Bailey, Montpelier VT, MA, M.Ed
Rosemary Patton, San Francisco
Helen Updike, New York, wealth manager
Louise de Vries, Larkspur, CA, retired bookkeeper
Patty Langdon - Hamden,CT - retired Research Administrator/Antiques Dealer>Cynthia H. Flagg - Tucson,AZ - retired Clinical Social Worker
Carolyn Grave - Guilford, CT - ArtistAlison Steadman - Washington, D.C. - retired LibrarianHarriet Ball - Alexandria, VA. - Clinical Social WorkerRives Carroll - Washington, D.C. - EducatorJenifer Neils - Cleveland, OH - Professor of Art History & ArchaeologyAnna Lawson - Roanoke, VA. - retired AnthropologistAnne Lunt - Temple, NH. - EditorNan Montgomery - Bethesda MD. - ArtistMary Severson - Carmel Valley, CA - retiredAmanda Madar - Cleveland, OH. - retired ESL Teacher
Dorothy Wexler - Washington, DC. - retiredJacqueline Fesler - Lexington, MA - Technical Writer/EditorBetty Arbuckle - Washington, D.C. - Financial ServicesShirley Lindenbaum, New York, anthropologist
Bette McDevitt, Pittsburgh PA, peace activist
Miriam Poser, New York City, retired
Carol Greenberg - Brattleboro, VT - Antiquarian BooksellerGreta Walker, New York City, real estate
Robin A. Samuels. New York City, Educator
Merle Geline Rubine, NYC
Arlene Ellner, New York City, Peace Activist
Tanya Laurer, Chester NY, Artist
Mary Rossabi, Brooklyn, NYC, retired teacher
Mary Geissman, New York City, retired financial manager for international non-profit
Virginia Davies, New York City, Lawyer
Naomi F. Chase, New York City
Ruth S. Meyers, New York City, psychoanalyst
Elaine Ford, Harpswell, Maine, Professor Emerita
Betty "Coqui" Brassell -- New York City, retired telephone operator, peace activist
Linda Saisselin, LCSW, Greenwich Village, New York City, psychotherapist
Hazel M. McFerson, Ph.D, Fairfax VA, Associate Professor of int'l studies
Sarilee Janger, Castro Valley CA, Retired
Roz Boyd, New York City, retired science librarian
Joan Wile, New York City, peace activist and author
Marie Runyon, New York City, former NYS Assemblywoman
Diane Dreyfus, Baltimore, architect
Ronnie Eldridge, New York City, former NYC Councilwoman, now TV talk show hostess
Madelon Holder, New York City, Occupation Therapy Assistant
Deborah May, Bronx, New York, HIV/AIDS Educator
Barbara Walker, Staten Island NY, retired United Nations educator
Rosalyn Fassett, Warwick NY, artist and Professor of art history
Marianne Novy, Pittsburgh PA, Professor
Edith Bell, Pittsburgh PA, retired
Phyllis Behar, New York City, retired businesswoman
Florence Hepner, New York City, retired exec. assistant for an int'l non-profit
Beverly Rice, New York City, retired nurse and currently peace activist
Linda Voorsanger, Brooklyn NY, retired college instructor
Roberta Semer, New York City, consultant
Hilda Meltzer, New York City, retired assertiveness trainer
Susie Himelhoch, Ketering OH, campaign manager for United Way of Greater Dayton Area
Theresea Girouard - Jefferson, NHPatty Mould -Scarborough, ME - Government Relations Professor, retiredMolly R. Martin - Marlboro, VT - retired
Lucy Adams, New YorkMary McCain, Washington, D.C.
Edith Hill Updike, Long Island, University lecturerTheresa Swenson, Long Island JournalistAnnie Blatchey, Long Island, JournalistJane Schneider, New York, retired professor, New York
Mary S. Moffroid, Vermont, Professor Emeritus Frances Fox-Piven, New York, Distinguished ProfessorEvelyn Fox Keller, Cambridge, MassachusettsBobby Cohen, New York, Literary agent, author Barbara Sacks, New YorkMicki Stickford, New YorkLisa Adams -Washington, D.C.- Interior Design/Professor of Interior Design>Linda Levine - NYC - Anthropologist/Teacher-Educator>
Peggy Robin - Washington, D.C. - WriterJoan Chapin Smith - Cambridge, MA - Clinical Social WorkerKatharine Johnson Kahn - NYC - PsychotherapistCarol Greenberg - Brattleboro, VT - Antiquarian BooksellerWendy Innis - Brattleboro, VT
Marcia Spencer - Brattleboro, VT - DesignerPhyllis Komintz - Weston, MA - retired
Susan Train - Paris, France - JournalistNina de Voogd - Lectoure, France - TranslatorPeggy Fleming - Washington, D.C. - PhotographerMiki Clements Collier - Temple, NH - Horse Show Judge/Riding InstructorConnie Kelly - Temple, NH - retiredAnne Impellezeri, New York,Kathleen Ladd Ward - Hingham, MA - Art Historian/WriterJean Thibodeau -Temple, NH - Legal SecretaryLinda Claff - Sharon, NH - Innkeeper
Annelise Brand, Washington DC, retired
Amy Little, New Paltz NY, political consultant
Joan Cadette; retired teacher; Millbrook, NYJulia Widdowson, Millbrook, NY, grass fed cattle rancherDagni B. Senzel, New York, NY, landscape designer Madeleine Swain, New York, NY, leadership consultant
Diane Schor, New York CityGerda Meller, Miami, Florida Connie Colman, Warren, Vermont, Home Health AdministratorBarbara Nagy, Torrance, California Lucy Robinson, Amherst, MA, actorLouise Caldwell, St.Louis, MO, educatorKaura B. Brines, Waitsfield,Vermont, teacher

The year's hottest artists on the red carpet at the Grammy Awards. AOL Music takes you there

Thursday, February 7, 2008


by Joan Wile, Founder, Grandmothers Against the War, and author
"Grandmothers Against the War: Getting off Our Fannies and Standing up for Peace,"
to be published by Citadel Press, April 29, 2008

I'm getting a bit ticked off with all the pundits and polling reports that claim that older women are for Hillary. In my circles, this just isn't true. I can't speak officially for my two organizations, Grandmothers Against the War, and Granny Peace Brigade, because of financing and ethical rules, but I can certainly speak for many individual grandmothers of my acquaintance.

Peace grannies, who have been in the vanguard of the anti-war movement since before Shock and Awe shocked us to our very core with horror, have been consistently opposing Hillary since before the resolution giving Bush authority to start preemptive war was announced. At first, we tried through letters and petitions to get her agreement NOT to vote for the resolution -- I, for instance, was part of a MoveOn team of people who visited with her New York City staff to urge her to oppose the resolution -- but once that failed, we grannies began a number of protests aimed at her, along with Code Pink and others. Many times, we held vigils outside her Third Avenue offices. Many times, we bird dogged her at her fund raisers -- so many of them held here in Manhattan where the big, big money resides.

We have been so angered by her. It wasn't enough that she supported that damned Resolution, she has continually advocated more troops in Iraq. That is, until it became clear to her that such a stance would hurt her Presidential ambitions....very late in the game, it must be said. Then, and only then, did she claim to be opposed to the occupation of Iraq. And, never once has she admitted to making a mistake. She insists that the intelligence was faulty and that it was the correct decision given that intelligence. Excuse me, why is it we old ladies (and so many millions of other people) could see this war would lead only to disaster but she, with all her privileged information, couldn't (or, more to the point, wouldn't?)

Obama had it so right when he deftly punctured the myth she propagates that she is uniquely qualified to be President on "Day One" because of her "35 years of experience" when he said in their L.A. debate, "It isn't enough to have experience on Day One, you have to be RIGHT on Day One." Amen.

And, now that we're on the subject of experience, and specifically her claimed 35 years of experience, never have I heard such blatant false propagandizing in my 76 years of existence. I'm no whiz at mathematics, but even I can add 2 and 2, and I fail to see how a few years in law school, plus some years as a corporate lawyer, many years as the wife of an Arkansas governor and 8 years as the wife (and mostly a disgruntled one) of the President add up to 35 years of preparation for the Presidency. I count 4 years as a Senator and 2 as a part-time Senator while campaigning to reoccupy the White House as the relevant training. That adds up to 4 and 2 part-time years of experience, I believe, unless my arithmetic is out of whack.

On the other hand, I count Obama's approximately 12 years as a community organizer in a large city, his 7 years as a state legislator and his 2 years as a U.S. Senator as somewhere in the vicinity of 21 years of relevant experience to be President. Quite a no-brainer, isn't it?.

I'm thoroughly convinced, therefore, that he will be ready on Day One, and so are many, many other old broads like me. I'm in touch with peace grandmothers all across the nation and I have a pretty sound grasp of where they stand with respect to the candidates. I can authoritatively attest to the fact that there is an enormous pool of un-surveyed older women who enthusiastically support Obama. Not only do we support him, but we will be sorely antagonized if Hillary Hawk is allowed to make her nest in the Oval Office.

Sunday, February 3, 2008


by Joan Wile, Founder, Grandmothers Against the War
and Author, "Grandmothers Against the War; Getting off Our Fannies and Standing up for Peace," to be published by Citadel Press, April 29, 2008

HILL: I'm glad you toned down your attacks on Obama a little, but how the hell could you lose Kennedy?

BILL; That old double crossing windbag? And after all the cozying up we did with him sailing on his yacht until I puked.

HILL; You're supposed to be the master politician, so how come you let the big one get away like that?

BILL: Don't have a hissy fit. I got even with him the other day when I said that he voted for the No Child Left Behind bill that Bush sponsored. That'll fix his wagon.

HILL: You idiot!! I voted for it, too. Just wait until the pundits get hold of THAT one. I can just see Maureen Dowd's next column.

BILL: Well, you're making your share of goofs, too. That gobbleygook you spouted in the LA debate about why you voted for authorizing Bush to attack Iraq was an embarrassment! Obama really one-upped you on that one. Why don't you LISTEN to me? I told you years ago to say it was a mistake and apologize and get it over with. But, you can't admit to making mistakes. It drives me crazy.

HILL: That's nothing compared to your relationship with that Canadian mining millionaire. The one who donated $31 million to your Library. The one you helped make a deal with the Kazakhstan mining company. It's all over the papers now. I BEGGED you not to pal around with that guy. I have a hard enough time keeping the press off my tail about our donations from drug companies and PACs.

BILL: If you think I'm going to pass up 31 million bucks just so you can compete with me and become President, you're nuts.

HILL: Aha!! I knew you subconsciously wanted me to lose. You can't STAND to let me steal your thunder. And, you know damned well that I won't screw up like you did. You just couldn't keep your pants zipped, could you?

BILL: I was horny, for Christ's sake. Who wouldn't be with a cold fish for a wife like you? But, there's one thing you can't top me at, sister. They LOVED me, and they still do. You're lucky if they even like you, much less love you. You just don't have it. You're too stern, too icy. Let's face it, no magnetism, lady. I don't care how loudly you laugh, you just don't make it in the personality department.

HILL: Well, that's not our biggest problem. We've got to silence all the talk of a co-presidency.

BILL: So, what do you think I'm going to do if you're President? Make up menus for state dinners? You'd better believe it will be a co-presidency. That was our deal. I campaign for you and I'll run things on the sly.

HILL: You S.O.B. I'M going to make the decisions.

BILL: What? And run the country into the ground? NO WAY!

HILL: You're not going to tell me what to do. Go off to Africa or someplace and let ME handle things. (THROWS PILLOW AT HIM.)

BILL: You don't really want me to leave you alone there, do you? You know you can't cut it. (THROWS PILLOW BACK)

They start to push each other and fall down on the ground tussling.